oh near...

I ventured to the dentist today. WHY? you ask (and I know you were asking, becuase who willfully goes to the dentist?)..well for a couple of reasons actually, I recently paid attention to the fact that I am paying bi-monthly for dental insurance and not using it, and because my teeth could use a good cleaning. So to the phone book I go to find a dentist near my house. Away I go. I am pretty positive I don't have cavities even before I go, thankfully I have really healthy teeth. My only other concern is the whole whitening process. I have been told by a few other professionals that my teeth shouldn't be whitened because of the stain/trauma/scar thing that is on my left front tooth (insert reason for such a thing: flippy thing gone wrong with kate at age 7). So after xrays and a thorough (and quite painful) cleaning, a very kind and cheerful (maybe TOO cheerful...) dentist informs me that the root on said tooth is calcified, and the way to fix it is a root canal and then a crown. I wanted to cry. Still do actually. I don't want to do it. I know I need to because my tooth is going to get more discolored and eventually hurt me in someway (think abscess here) and then the process will be worse. But really, I just like my teeth and don't want to have a root canal. So in the end all I can really say is... oh near.

happy halloween

I dressed up 3 times. I was supposed to be a rockstar-type individual. Don't know how well I pulled it off. But for two parties and 12 hours of work, it was a pretty good costume. I fully expect pictures from all of you that have children and don't. But especially kate and ry. So here is pic of me and my roomates at our ward halloween party.

"i can't be pretty anymore"

A friend from work told me this shortly after she cut off about 12 inches of her hair to donate to locks of love, and she was a little bit distressed about having short hair now. I thought it was funny at the time, until I decided to dye my hair teal. Yes teal. Let's think about that for a second, and now that if I had truly thought about it, I would not have tried it. Yet I did. So to the salon I go, thinking, they are professionals, this should be no problem for them. So we bleach oh about 4 chunks of my hair blonde, and then proceed to put the teal on top of that so it would stay. The ugliest color I have ever seen. Sea foam, mermaid-esque disgusting color. So I tell her just to make the pieces blonde again, thnking that will be fine. And it would have been, had she toned them or made them the same color, or even took the time to make sure they were evenly bleached. She didn't. At first I couldn't really tell how bad it was, but after many days trying to style and wash my hair, there were lots of pieces that were that dirty color blonde..really quite hideous. So new plan, my roomate who wanted to go to hairschool, help me dye the blonde pieces red. So we sectioned them off with foil, and proceeded to dye them, well a bright pinkish orange would be the best way to describe it. So back to the salon I go (of note, a different salon) where I now realize that in fact, I can be pretty again. With blonde and red highlights, I feel so much better about my hair and have possibly learned my lesson. Possibly.

a question??

So the other day in church we were talking about agency and someone made a comment about choices and how sometimes our agency is taken away from us by others actions..and I am having a hard time wrapping my mind around it. Can our agency be taken away from us? Doesn't that go against the whole purpose of the plan and everything? Maybe I am reading too much into this but if I could get y'alls perspective on it that would be GREAT!!

and its another...

COUGAR FIRST DOWN!!....I love those words. I mean I love it. Really love. In case you don't know me AT ALL, I love football. I am sitting in my downstairs living room, alone, on a saturday afternoon, and what have I done all day...watch football. So I sadly did not get the BYU game on TV today, so I relied on espn and watched the play by play as the cougars destroyed tulane!!! (go cougs!!), while also keeping close tabs on the Texas-Wyoming game (started out a little shaky for the Horns, but they pulled it out in the end), while watching the ONLY game I got on the TV: Michigan vs Notre Dame, and of course don't REALLY care who wins, but based on the commentators (who I hate) I a rooting for Michigan. This game has no bearing on me whatsoever (do any of them really?) and yet, I can't be turned away. I love it. At this moment I want to be IN ann arbor as the game comes down to the final minutes, as the wolverines try to keep the lead against the irish. I am crazy, and boring you I am sure, but I just needed to share the fact that I LOVE COLLEGE FOOTBALL!!

"let not your hearts be troubled"

So some of you may know that this past week I took care of a lady at work that was raped, and that this experience sent me in to a tailspin of sorts. I was scared, literally scared. I bought a knife. Then because of some sound advice I bought pepper spray. Guess what? the irrational fear was still there. Ok, so I am not saying that being cautious is irrational, but the level of fear that I felt about the possiblity of it happening to me was pretty irrational. The point. The point is that I happened upon an epiphany that the thing I need to keep me from feeling afraid I already had in my possession. The holy ghost. I feel so much more at peace. Not to say that I won't keep the pepper spray handy (face it, I am a single gal and sould be safe) but I am not scared anymore. I feel a peace and calm that can only come from that great Comforter. John 14:27. Happy sunday!!

my adultness

I have recently moved into a house. Sure with three very awesome roomates (depsite rumblings of discord..things are going well) and I am very excited about it. I absolutely loathed the whole packing and moving business, but once that was done ( and by done I mean that everything is out of my old apartment..not necessarily put away here at the house..but still)I loved putting things up on the walls, organizing our 200 movies (in aphabetically order thanks to a slightly ocd roomate) and most of all..buying a bed and other bedroom furniture to put in my room.... ta da...


I feel very grown-up in this bedroom. Me. The girl who was NEVER going to grow-up..am finally embracing my adultness, and I pretty jazzed about it. Well..at least about my grown-up bedroom that is. I will say that although my bedroom very well could be an add for IKEA, I love it. And am going to try with everything I have to keep any messiness contained to the very large walk-in closet. I did perhaps gain some insight as to why the messiness might linger, and it is this, I am a perfectionist..sure maybe that seems not like me at all..but in school I have to get good grades..not that I want to..I have to. So it goes apparently with my bedroom..I wanted to cry when a friend came in and jumped in the middle of my nicely made bed (apparently channeling my mother here) and messed it up. I painstakingly hung things up so they would be in the middle of the space and had my level so things would be just so. I decided that it is easier to live with mess than to deal with that level of OCD/anxiety/anal/freakiness. That being said, I do like my room, and am going to make a concerted effort to keep it tidy. There..i blogged. With pictures. On with it. :)